by JENNIFER GOODSON, MA, LMHC
“Do not despise small beginnings,” said the older woman in the room. She looked with a smile and just nodded her head toward me. I immediately felt agitation rise, and my face grew hot. Yes, I became defensive quickly. I wasn’t sure if I was frustrated with her or myself because I knew she was right.
I didn’t like it because this meant I had to wait for something to “happen,” and I did not want to wait. I didn’t like waiting.
I mean, who does when you’re in your early 20s? I’m sure the older woman meant well. However, it still rubbed me the wrong way. Who was she to tell me to “be patient” with my journey to wherever I thought I was going?
So many years later, I won’t give away my age (smirk). Maybe, I’m the older woman in the room. But I get it! Although seriously, my headspace was not in the waiting. Waiting meant I had to embrace the process, which wasn’t something I was familiar with at that time in my life. I had a set destination and a plan to get there, but I was not ready for life.
We encounter many obstacles and snares when walking through this journey of life. We have those roads with the S curves, the steep hills, and even the crooked paths giving us a scar here and there. We may sometimes find ourselves cycling around the same mountain, wondering whether we will ever get off this merry-go-round. Our pace may be slow at moments and a roller coaster speed at others.
How many of us feel this way when we have something in sight? That “something” is our destination, but how we get there defines us. Our journey builds character and stamina from life happenings. But when we signed up for the ride, did we agree to the process?
The process is a continual movement of change and forming new healthy habits. Change is always challenging and uncomfortable. Sometimes, it is not an aroma of sweet lustrous flowers. Other times, the smells of our trashy complaints/excuses rise to our nostrils. At some point, the negative exhaustion has to come to an end.
It is all about our perspective. We can look at it our way and continue to cycle around the mountain once again, or we can change our perspective, commit to the process, grow, and arrive at our destination.
The velocity we move is based upon our mindset, everyday routines, and commitment to being flexible when thrown off course. Why? Because change is inevitable if we are to grow and achieve our career, relationship, and health goals.
It is crucial to realize that the outcome will never be tangible if we do not change what we are doing now. We must make sacrifices when wanting to achieve something; our choices and desired outcomes demand our attention.
So how do we embrace the process, accept change, and get moving?
- Embrace the process by noticing the things in your circle of control and those that are not. The stuff in your control you can change. All others, leave alone!
- Accept change with this mantra: Daily routine builds structure.
Daily – One small step to change is ending one lousy habit and forming a healthy one.
Routine – Create steadiness in your actions beginning at the start of each day.
Structure – Build one new habit onto the previous one.
Repeat – Then do it again.
- Get moving by keeping an open mind to the curveballs. Life will continue to happen; how you respond to it determines your velocity of movement and final destination.
When we embrace the process, we open ourselves to growth. When we accept change, we begin to feel that development is occurring. Routine keeps the structure in the forefront so when life happenings derail us, we have a foundation anchored in our body, mind, and spirit.
Feel encouraged to make small changes that will birth significant, life-changing results.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Jennifer Goodson, MA, LMHC, is a licensed mental health counselor with an office in Winter Haven, FL. She holds a Master of Arts in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Regent University in Virginia Beach, Virginia. For more information, visit www.pathwaycounselingservice.com.